1)

Well that's just not very sanitary.  :(

2)

This is the police!  Drop it!

3)

Bruins fan!!!???  No wonder she appears to live in a motel.

4)

Solid masonry

5)

Always do your hair and make-up before surfing the web in your underwear

6)

I like your tatt of a tiger that hates flowers

7)

Firefox

8)

"Snakes.  Why did it have to be snakes?"