1)

Hi.  It's me.  That guy standing over you.  With a camera.  Not creepy at all.

2)

Durrr!

3)

I just want to pull her teeth out and chew 'em like chiclets

4)

Make a note ladies: Buterfly tatts are cliche' and stupid

5)

The pink disrupts the camo

6)

Hey Minnie!  Lookin' awful.....damp there

7)

Soft

8)

Presto!  I'm Spent!