1)

Odds that she paid for this drink?  Low.  Very low.

2)

LOOK AT ME!

3)

"Grandma's house" is code for the strip club.

4)

Slippery when wet

5)

Hmmm.  I've never heard her speak a word, and already I get the impression she hates me.

6)

Looks like rain

7)

That's a very expensive hood ornament