1)

Has anybody seen Dat ass?  Oh there it is.

2)

What the hell is your problem?  Your hot, just get some idiot to buy you something.  Problem solved.

3)

If the first thing you noticed was that she is a Michigan fan, I have some bad news for you.

4)

This one is pretty generic.  But still nice.

5)

All of the finest restaurants are pants optional.

6)

Note: Never trust a hot chick leaning casually against a building while holding a gun.  No matter what her shirt says. (I learned that lesson the hard way)

7)

Awww that's cute.......except for the fact that the cat looks sort of....well....dead.

8)

HAHAHAHA!  Good one!  Now get out of the @%$!ing fridge before my beer gets warm!!!!