_becauseMondayssuck blog because Mondays suck

  • The Little One Is ALWAYS The Bully

    Posted by Span

    Courtesy of Youtube


    It's hard to call it bullying because in the natural order of the universe the strong devour the weak. But whether you believe in the Biblical concept of Man's dominion over nature or not, the key is that we are certainly different from the environment.

    As a younger kid in elementary school I remember a boy named Kevin who pretty much ran our grade. He was young and handsome and smart and clever so he had first choice over a great many things. Teachers loved him. Students feared him.

    I hated him. Not because I was his polar opposite, which I was, but because he represented everything that was wrong with the world. Playing to favorites. Running over the weak. Hurt for no reason. Anguish. Greed. Negligence. Rampant selfishness. Yeah, I hated him. A lot.

    Now I get to use my mind and my charm to crush my detractors. Most times I don't even have to do the fighting. It's a special gift I've received in my wit that I use, with everything else I got, to protect those who cannot protect themselves and level the playing fields against those who would be less than human to endlessly indulge their own selfish whims...*stepping off soapbox*


    Man I can get preachy. Regardless, this video makes me feel a lot better about things knowing that this kid, maybe for the first time in his life, stood up for himself.







  • What If Ferris Was Whiny And Angsty?

    Posted by Span

    Courtesy of Youtube

    Too much eye makeup, eh? Not this Ferris. Imagine Ferris with no sense of society or popularity. Just an average kid playing hookie from school, finding his way through a world of adults who hold all the power, but none of the compassion. Well, at least, that's what this trailer has me thinkin'.

    This Ferris is less social genius and more populist savante with a touch of Asberger's and a whole lot of curiosity. Gotta make the music more peppy though. With some Van Halen. Yeaaaaaah. Van Hagar too. Wait...what am I talking about again?


  • Man Shot Twice...Wants To Be Shot More

    Posted by Span

    By Bjørn Bulthuis from Langley, BC, Canada (pat in first aid) [CC-BY-SA-2.0 (www.creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons


    A Lansing man was shot by someone he claims to have a long-standing feud with. But then tells police that he couldn't remember the shooter's name or description? Sounds like he enjoys getting shot.









  • Just Another Reason Soccer Is Ridiculous

    Posted by Span

    Courtesy Wikimedia Commons


    I played soccer in high school. Goalie. And, in fact, I was pretty good at it. But once I was off the field, I never watched soccer. Very nearly hated it in fact. Too many ridiculous little rules on so many random things (tackling) while having no rules about stuff that mattered (flopping).

    This story PERFECTLY demonstrates some of the uniquely stupid kinks in a sport that's waaaaaay too old and too popular to behave this way.

    The score was 1-1 with only 20 minutes of regularion left in a heated match between two evenly skilled squads. Out of nowhere a streaker in a green thong jumps onto the field. An English professional soccer player sees him and tackles him for the authorities. The ref, seeing this, gives the player a red card and kicks him out of the game. OUT. OF. THE. GAME!!!!!



  • Michigan State Spartans Football: One More Gift From The 2010 Season

    Posted by Span

    Courtesy Wikimedia Commons


    The Michigan State Spartans Had one of their best football seasons in years. They beat rivals U of M and Penn State in decisive fashion. They went 11 and 2 overall and 7 and 1 in the Big Ten sharing the Big Ten Conference Title with Ohio State and Wisconsin. And put in an appearance on the national stage with a major bowl game.

    But the 2010 Spartan season has one more present for you. They're not gonna raise prices on season tickets for 2011. For the third year in a row the Michigan State athletic department will leave the pricing structure the same for season ticket holders.


    At a time when they could charge a premium for Spartans Football tickets, they do the fanbase a solid and hold back on gouging them for higher profits. Nice.

  • Polar Plunge 2011: Span's Heeeeeelarious Rough-Cut Perspective

    Posted by Span

    my pic


    I jumped in the Polar Plunge. AND I recorded it. Many many thanks and MUCH love to Sara, Cameron, Anonymous, James, and Claudia who donated to make this hilarious video possible.




    Here's the footage from MY perspective (skip to the 3 minute mark to get right to the plunge and miss out on hilarious commentary from me and my jumpmates):

  • What Did I Get Myself Into...Again?

    Posted by Span

    My pic.


    What have I done? Geeez. Everything I think about jumping into that water my heart picks up the pace a little. Remember, I've done this before. And it was...not comfortable.

    Well, you'll see and hear all my misery up close and personal cuz my waterproof camera works. Proof:


    I said I'd post the video if and ONLY if I got enough donations. Well...I did already. Get enough money that is. But would it kill you to give five tax-deductible dollars to The Special Olympics to show appreciation for the fact that I hurtled my body into the frigid Mid-Michigan deep? Exactly. So give. Please. Just five bucks. And you get to laugh at my misery. What could be more American?

  • Span Is Gonna Jump Into Freezing Water For A Good Cause

    Posted by Span

    Courtesy Wikimedia Commons

    I'm gonna jump my silly butt into very cold, very freezing water on Sunday. I know it's very cold and very freezing cuz I did it last year. So why would my dumb butt do it again if I know how physically miserable it will make me? Because it's for a good cause.

    The Special Olympics do a lot to help kids who, otherwise, go ignored by popular society. It gives them a chance to participate in something bigger than themselves. To test their limits. To develop skills. And, more importantly, to grow as fellow human beings.

    Help me help them BY DONATING HERE. Every dollar you give is one less they need. I'm asking for five bucks though.


    My Pic

    Because if I reach $100 I'm going to post the video I will record of my total and abject misery for your complete enjoyment. So, if you wanna catch a giggle at my expense donate to The Special Olympics.

    Oh, and it's tax deductible. So give the money. You'll get a laugh out of it AND you get to feel good. Sounds like win/win to me. But not for me. It's gonna be cold for me. VERY VERY cold.

  • Give Away Cool Stuff To Thank You For Listening Thursday 2/10/11

    Posted by Span



    Those of you who stopped by to get something for nothing, THANK YOU. Seriously. Thanks for coming out! To those of you that didn't, you can beg our forgiveness when you come out to the next Give Away Cool Stuff To Thank You For Listening Thursday.





    Thanks for the hat Kieran and Tiffany!




    Heather, Kieran, Tiffany